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Where do you work through your crap?

Personal growth. Personal Space. (blah blah blah)

10 years ago I was super angry, with a HUGE CHINA sized wall around me. I sure couldn’t share my personal space. I’d beat you out of it in a heart beat. Literally.

Learning how to teach yoga, especially to men, was a HUGE HUGE (HUGE) challenge.

It’s really interesting how little life events intersect. To come together like a couple of chords to make a pleasant sound. Or musical instruments, to play together, to practice…leading to a fine piece of music. It’s like…time stops and…AHHHHH.

That’s what happened to me in the swimming pool during 2012. Apparently, despite the fact that I almost drowned (seriously) when I was little, I am HOME in the water. HOME.

What does that mean. We are all made up of…different constitutes. Type A. MB. Wood/fire. There are a ton of ways to characterize people. They all come down to the same thing. I’ll lean towards the more holistic/yoga definitions. They are cool and interesting. Type A sounds so ANAL and negative. So…my strongest “elements” (Chinese nomenclature) is WATER and WOOD. Wood would be a lot of TYPE A. Water…more artistic. That part of me a lot of you haven’t seen. You can check out my art here…ARTIST.

What’s the point. When I swim…I’m in the environment to really get in touch with myself. Check this out…whether I like to or not. It sort of…does whatever the F it wants. It can be very frustrating. But useful too. Especially if you know whats going on and can work with it. Speeds you along the healing/integration process.

Why am I writing about it now. I’m dealing with something super duper (uber) deep. It’s just about finished and I’m swimming in the pool more.

So…the emotions come up to the surface. In the pool I’m working HARD to correct some of my weaknesses. (maybe that’s why it’s in the pool…I’m pretty comfortable everywhere else).

Lets all chuckle for a moment.

The point is…everyone has a different mix of these “constitute flavors”. So everyone is going to be different…where they find that space. In the Catholic Church. In a forest. On a park bench. Mountain top. Playing music. With family. Meditating. Doing yoga. Running. Praying. Sex.

For me, for right now…it’s swimming.

swimming-at-andover1All this STUFF got stored in my body, my mind, my spirit ( my _____ ).  Some of this stuff has been locked up for many longs years, now working its way to the surface and doggedly expressing the need for release.

So I swim with my goggles filled with tears. Do my best to scale back and relax. Find rhythm. Honor the process, get my body in sync with the water and let the water do its thing.

Here’s the KEY: know when the moment has passed and move on. Leave it in the water. Get out of the pool a little bit different. With new space.

I hope you find where your space it at. That space that rings true for you. Like a beautiful heart stopping chord.

YOU ARE AWESOME!
bonnie-sig

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