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Today winning meant being slow AF

There as been a lot going on in my life lately that while I have been managing fairly well, it still takes a toll. You’ve got your parenting responsibilities. For those of you who are parents, you know that sometimes raises little people can be down right taxing. This weekend and the last couple of months with my teenagers have been a challenge. And you parents know that when you have created, carried, sweated, bled, kissed and cried over those little people, this stress is a big one. Momma bear stuff.

 

Then you’ve got your “put food on the table” stressors. Running your own business and figuring out how to do that well, with more ease and what not isn’t any small feat. Being your own boss is awesome and not awesome at the same time. It’s real life stuff. Responsibility. Adulting. And the coaching world isn’t an easy one. Especially if you try to do your best all the time and try to figure out how to lead your people to doing their best as well. It’s real, raw and honest (and tough) at times. Especially considering that we attract people like ourselves. Hahahaha. OMG! 😉 just joking. Not joking. Haha. I’m one of my biggest fans yet some days I’m like … “BK seriously, get your ducks in a row, or at least in the same room.”

 

Then spice all that up with some other personal stuff of my own choosing that I’ve decided to work on and you’ve got a big tall order. I’ve had my share of tough times in life and some things to work on to get to the next best version of myself. We all do. When we start looking at those things straight on, life gets sweeter but sometimes the cleaning up and healing of things is a little challenging at times.

 

I was listening to podcast today about the 10 pillars of health. This smartie doctor guy was talking about his system that works to address all the “pillars” of health. Very interesting stuff and you know, not really a new idea. The yogi’s and eastern medicine have been working on this stuff for a long time. Here in the western world were we have our boot straps and type a/work harder mentality … the idea that in order to optimize health by working on all aspects of life, well thats not common sense to us.

 

I learned this lesson pretty well last year training for IMTX after three failed heart surgeries and deciding to have a different go of it. Not using western meds to control A-fib and working on these “pillars”. It worked really well and I was super pumped. Then came some personal stuff, again, of my own choosing … and I got in over my head for a bit. Or maybe not, but more of my energy went into the personal growth pillar for a sec while I tried to really work on some things and heal up some old wounds.

 

BOOM! And so in the sunshine I’m working with a newer version of myself and have to acknowledge that in my balancing of my life, one of my “pillars” is a little lacking. And that would be the physical one. Where I’m not as fast on the bike or run as what I use to be or what I want.

I mean seriously. Three time ironman finisher. Countless HIMs under my belt and here I am. Fluffy, slow, strong and still very awesome. I would love love love to be 15 pounds lighter. Be stronger. Look outwardly how I feel. But right now, with all that has been going on, I am in a state of physique that, while not optimal, is doing ok.

 

I had set out to do a 3 hour bike ride. Followed by a bit of running. A little bit of that motivation to do all that volume so far out from my next HIM was driven by weight lose. Maybe to beat the fat down and force it to go away. How many of us think like that? More is better right?

 

GRACE AND GRIT

 

Well, I got to thinking. What would be the most lovely thing that you could do for yourself right now. After all, the training plan says an hour bike. So two is more than enough. How about BK … you slow down and just enjoy the sun and acknowledge that fact that you can be out here. That you GET to do this. That you are healthy enough to even do an hour. Seriously. Love all the fat cells for a second and just LOVE every thing part of you.

 

GRACE: So I slowed down. Talked to all the cows. Really enjoyed the sunshine and the awesome cross wind that was blowing at a nice 20 mph. I focused on my daily reading of HOPE. And positive action, in the face of everything going on. Yep, I was a full mph slower than last weekends two hour ride which i was crazy happy with. This ride felt equally as good tho.

 

GRIT: I was kind to myself. I was strong enough today to give myself grace and the grit to KNOW that today the mph pace didn’t dictate if the workout was a success. Grit to give other areas equal merit. After all, I was well within the plan. So the box is a definite green. And thats good enough. More than good enough.

 

It is a win.

YOU ARE AWESOME!
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Strong is: Hop scotching through the crap show of life to ROCK OUT your 4k swim

❤️👊🏻💥 Life can be so hard somethings.

We have sons that struggle with mental health ... suicide thoughts and emotional pain is not as uncommon as we’d like to think. Seriously, being a mom is sooo tough. 💔Sometimes your heart seems to get pulled out your nose. 💔Relationships are tough. 🦠Managing our own crazy can be tough. Working on personal growth can really leave you feeling naked and ultra vulnerable.

🏊‍♀️So getting your tail to the pool or where ever can be a big effort. Especially as moms and bread winners, role models and the like ... we have to put the game faces on. Play like we are ok.

So for those of you who aren’t quite ok. ❤️❤️ Or just not ok ... hang in there. Try and reach out. Find someone you can say stuff to.

Today I was talking w someone who’s just starting out in tri. We know each other decently. She’s a real / honest / no drama kinda of girl. She said ... “swimming is your safe place, just don’t think of any of the bs”. And it really hit home. Swimming is my safe place. I’m not super fast. I’m have severe swim anxiety. But I’ve conquered all that. I’ve heal a nice portion of my soul in the pool and open water.

I’m doing this crazy challenge of 100x100s Jan 1. Which is kinda silly as I have a needy shoulder. Hahahaha. And right now I swim about 6 times a month. I haven’t same more than 2000 in a hot min. Like since IMTX18. Hahahaha. Omg. However. I do a lot of strength work and yoga/swim stuff.

🐠🦈AND I ROCKED THE HELL OUT IF THIS SWIM. 🐳🐡

👊🏻💥AND ROCKED THE HELL OUT OF LIFE for 1:25:34.

And that just helped me bounce back to feeling so much stronger and capable. I showed myself that ... yep. I’m stronger than what I was feeling.

So ladies. When you are feeling low. Defeated. Drowning w life or whatever. Keep your head up. Reach out. And show up. Get your mind right. Just for that workout or even 5 minutes. Whatever. Do the best you can, w putting all things to the side.

Oh. And I did some SUPERWOMAN Breathing!!! 5 minutes and BOOM!!! 💥🏋️‍♂️💥🏋️‍♂️💃

TRAINING NOTES:

  • 8 x 500, RI 0:30 (no swim tools or aids)
  • Pacing work. I worked to keep my mind with "calm and strong", working to have a nice solid pull each stroke.
  • I began to practice nutrition. Each 500 I would stop for 30 seconds for a drink. First couple of 500s I used 20oz of water with Liquid IV, 500mg Na, 400 Mg Potassium. The 2nd half of the swim I used my bike blend of Infinite. I didn't like this as much and burbed it up a bit. I will go with Liquid IV next time for the duration and perhaps Glukos Gels for calories.
  • My right shoulder and pinkie finger was numb/achy for the 3rd 500. But I worked on form and that went away.
  • My nose was INCREDIBLY snotting after. My ears were blocked for a number of hours, probably due to the sneezing and what not. I will need to address this for longer swims in that pool. Finding a salt water pool would be a real good idea.
  • Shoulders were not sore at all the next day. I do a couple of different swim specific strength training workouts. 4 times a week optimally. 2-3 is required. Neck was a bit sore the next day. Though I would imagine that is because the 4k was done only breathing to the left. I was not able to get to every 3 due to heart rate not being chill enough.

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