We talk about goals. I want to do this. I want to do that. I want to lose weight. I want to do a marathon. I want to be a better mom and human being. I want to fix the anxiety.
We set goals. We have these big things that we want to do. We can get really wrapped up in that the end looks like. When we begin … most of the time we already have set the expectation of what success looks like. And it is usually borrowed from somewhere/someone else …. We might become very rigid in what that looks like. Become very attached to “creating” that exact thing or how we perceive it to “look”. Like… my 401K needs to have this amount of money it in because that is the only way I’m going to have security when I’m older. Or …. my kid has to turn out to gotten all good grades and went through college and got a good job and a good marriage in order for me to check mark that I was a good parent. Or … I have to hit my marathon goal to prove that I am a good enough athlete, that I’m not slow and pathetic”. I think that some amount of that is important. To hold the line. (I don’t believe in everyone gets a participation ribbon, sometimes the line needs to be far enough that some fail. So the lessons are learned).
Goals are GREAT. But the truth is that everything is changing all the time. Facts of science. And it’s just common sense that if that is true, hahaha, which it is, then the end picture if you will, has a high likelihood of looking different than what you envisioned when you started. You almost want to really embrace this because it means (proves) that you did change. Because we want to change. If the goal is big enough, and heart felt ones always are … you have to be different in order to accomplish it. Thats growth. You are either growing or you are dying. (THE DASH) We need to learn how to be flexible with those changes so we roll with the slight adjustments along the way. That is where faith comes in. Faith that when you GET ON THE ROAD, and work your ass of to go down the road, hopefully faster than slower, you don’t freak the heck out on the slight detours that might just gift you with most awesome stuff …. That lack of faith or freaking out at the detours can very well cause you to cheat yourself out of something glorious or the whole flipping goal.
DO NOT FREAK OUT
(plus be brave, look at what’s in front of you, pick up what you need, use the darn thing, and continue forward)
I do believe that all our goals, if we look close enough, have ties to our heart. “I want to lose this stupid 20 pounds!”. DEEP down I believe this stems from the #heartgoal of wanting to develop better self love activities, take better care of ourselves, love ourselves more, do the right things, etc. I do not believe that we REALLY want or are designed to drink our life away, or play small all the time or live a boring ass life that doesn’t make a dent anywhere. (A positive dent thank you very much!) Yeah, a lot will get hung up on fitting in the cute jeans, tri shorts, etc …. but I do truly believe that underneath that is the TRUE DESIRE to love ourselves more so we see (outwardly shine) a more attractive version of ourselves. It is the visual feedback that we accomplished the REAL CHANGE we wanted, the self love habits accomplished.
It’s the journey that matters. We begin. And we end. We start out gloriously perfect. We ALWAYS have the part of ourselves that is gloriously perfect and bright (we just cover it up). And we will always die. What you can influence with the “dash”. What you do in the middle is what matters.
Did you take the detour and help a stranger, perhaps save a life and grace yourself a bit too … or did you freak the f out and make life harder on yourself and those around you?
THE DASH MATTERS. What you do with the dash is what brightens life. What graces others. What dictates not the end number or the end goal, but how big of a smile there was. What gets WRITTEN ON YOUR TOMBSTONE is the dent you make. What do you want written on yours?
This is why I tell my athletes, GET THE BEST RACE PICTURE EVER! It represents all the blood, sweat and tears that it took to get there. It represents the DASH! The Journey. Doesn’t matter if you got on the podium or were dead last.
THE DASH MATTERS