Even adults need binkies

Meet Ganesh. My buddie that I’ve had for many years. I bought him for my birthday during my beginning years of yoga teacher training. It was a big turning point in my soul healing. Ganesh, for those that know yoga, means remover of obstacles. :) I got a lot of them so I thought at the time that I could use all the help that I could find. Plus the blue eyes I fell in love with. And his soft looking face.

He’s gone with m to all trips, races and what not. Been with me through a ton of good things and ugly things. I’ve almost melted down when I’ve realized I’ve left him somewhere. I’ve done a lot of extra driving to make sure he is by my side.

Why ... because he is an anchor for some qualities in life that I am working to cultivate. To have stronger in my life. And I believe in magic, miracles and pixie dust. Ganesh holds that idea for me when life gets tough.

Binkie. Security blanket. Totem. Prayer beads. Pet rock.

Overeating, sexting, drinking, mind numbing amounts of netflix.

Over exercising. Working too much. Yelling and blowing up.

It’s totally ok for babies and young people to have stuff animals, security blankets and the like. As adults/parents we know that one things the little people need to learn is how to soothe themselves, deal with emotions and learn how to be ok. Even when life is more fun.

We give the new babies a binkie. Some of us are partly given them binkies as a replacement for nurturing and being a parent. Tho a baby using a binkie to learn to self sooth is ok. When done mindfully. It’s a good point to drive home that it’s not unfrequent for parents to substitute parenting and nurturing for binkies, bouncing chairs and what not.

Our habit of inappropriately dealing with life starts very early.

We then give our children all these kinds of toys. Stuff animals and what not to ... help them. Let’s just say that parent x is doing everything just fine and the special stuff animal that they purchase for their kid is just a lovely add to their life. It’s ok and needed for the child to bond with this stuff animal. To them it. Take care of it and what not. There are many life lessons that are learned, practiced. And it’ socially acceptable.

At what age does it become unacceptable to not have binkies and security blankets.

We give up the magic of stuff animals for tough love, logic and “growing up”. We learn to be more hard and shut off, then remain soft and talk to stuff animals that aren’t actually alive.

They are now selling weighted blankets.

Perhaps we are doing ourselves wrong with expecting to be able to deal with life without providing ourselves “comfort”. I mean, we do provide ourselves with “comfort” but it’s usually in the form of the lists above. Things that aren’t inline with super healthy.

Perhaps we need to get back to soothing ourselves in a soft way. Don’t be worried about what other people think. Have stuffed animals that we take everywhere with us. Stuffed animals that we keep in our meditation spaces or our quiet and private areas.

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Balsamic Roasted Clafouti

Hey, since it's getting warmer out I thought maybe we'd try some fruit recipes! And who doesn't love a good dessert right?? Clafouti is a french dessert, similar to a flan and you add fruit to it. Super yummy and awesome on a summer evening! I used strawberries but you can use any berries. I've even used peaches and it was delicious. Some people dust this with powdered sugar before cutting, it is good either way. I just prefer to add the least amount of sugar possible. Happy baking!!

1 lb strawberries, trimmed and quartered (or fruit of choice)

1/3 cup plus 1 Tbsp maple sugar, divided (you can also use regular sugar or coconut if you have trouble finding maple sugar)

1 Tbsp balsamic vinegar

Cooking spray

3 large eggs

1 cup milk of choice

1/2 cup whole wheat flour (I had white whole wheat and used that)

1 tsp. vanilla

1/4 tsp. sea salt

2 Tbsp unsalted butter or ghee, melted

  1. Heat oven to 350. Place half of the fruit in an 8 x 8 baking dish. Stir in 1 Tbsp sugar and vinegar. Roast about 10 minutes, you want them soft but not mushy.
  2. Over a medium bowl strain the berries, saving the juice for later.
  3. Spray a 9 inch pie plate with cooking spray. In a blender mix eggs, milk, remaining 1/3 cup sugar, flour, vanilla and salt. Blend on high 30 seconds. Add melted butter and blend another minute. Pour into pie plate, top with roasted strawberries. Bake until the edges are golden and center is set but slightly jiggly, about 30 minutes. Trust me, you'll know what I mean by jiggly but set. It makes sense when you see it.
  4. Cool 10 minutes. Cut into wedges and top with fresh fruit.

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How protein helps with weight loss

Eating protein helps with losing fat, for a few reasons.

1. When you eat more protein, you tend to feel fuller longer.

Protein stimulates the release of satiety (stop-eating) hormones in the gut. So when you eat protein, you naturally tend to eat less, without feeling hungry.

(You can test this theory if you want. Go and try to eat an entire plain skinless chicken, or a few pounds of lean fish.)

2. Protein makes your body work to digest it.

Not all nutrients take the same energy to digest. Fat and carbohydrates are pretty easy for your body to digest and absorb, but protein takes more energy to digest and absorb.

If you eat 100 calories of protein, you’ll only use about 70 calories of it. (This thermic, or heat-producing, effect of protein is why you sometimes get the “meat sweats” after a big protein-heavy meal.)

3. Protein also helps you hang on to lean mass while you’re losing fat.

When you’re in a significant energy deficit (i.e. eating less than you burn), your body tries to throw out everything — fat, muscle, bone, hormones, etc. — all the stuff you need. It doesn’t tend to throw out just fat and keep muscle… unless you eat lots of protein.

Let’s take a deeper look: Protein, lean mass, and energy restriction

A recent study at McMaster University in Canada explored what would happen if people who were on a very low-calorie diet (about 40 percent less than normal energy needs), ate a lot of protein, and worked out hard.

For 4 weeks, a group of young men in their 20s were basically starved, but on a high-protein diet — about 2.4 g/kg.

So, for instance, a 200 lb (91 kg), relatively active young man whose energy needs would normally be 3000 calories per day might get:

  • 1800 calories per day (40 percent less than normal)
  • 218 grams of protein per day (2.4 x 91 kg)

This means that out of those 1800 calories per day, about 48 percent of them were from protein.

The men trained hard — lifting weights and doing high-intensity intervals 6 days a week.

After 4 weeks, on average:

  • The men gained about 1.2 kg (2.6 lb) of lean body mass (LBM).
  • They lost about 4.8 kg (10.5 lb) of fat.

The fact that they lost fat isn’t surprising, though that amount of fat loss in 4 weeks is pretty impressive.

What is surprising is that they gained LBM.

There was a control group, who ate more of a normal-protein, low-energy diet — about 1.2 grams of protein per kg (so, for our 200 lb / 91 kg man, that would be around 109 grams per day). This group, on average:

  • Gained 0.1 kg (0.2 lb) of LBM
  • Lost 3.5 kg (7.7 lb) of fat

This study was only 4 weeks long, and on a specific population group under close supervision, but it’s a cool experiment that suggests protein might be able to do some nifty things even under difficult and demanding conditions.

It’s particularly useful because it’s a randomized controlled trial. In other words, it’s not a food questionnaire where you try to remember what you ate last year — it’s a direct comparison of two similar groups whose food parameters are being closely monitored.

We don’t recommend a highly restrictive, high-protein diet combined with a Spartan-style workout plan as a long-term strategy, but if you want to try something crazy for 4 weeks, see if you can replicate these results!

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Grey Earl Tea for The Win

This tea is amazing with its health benefits. According to research, drinking 2 to 4 cups of Earl Grey tea every day will help you lose weight and improve your health in many ways. However, you need to keep in mind that if you are trying to lose weight, the tea should be taken without milk or sugar. Adding them will only defeat the purpose of burning calories. Since citrus is what helps boost metabolism and calorie-burning, add a dash of fresh lemon juice instead.

  • It protects you against strokes, heart disease, etc.
  • It also prevents different types of cancers including lung, esophageal, pancreatic, colorectal, bladder and mouth cancers.
  • Research has shown that it can help in increasing HDL cholesterol and blocks LDLs.
  • It unclogs the passageways in their arteries, thus improving their function.
  • It promotes oral health by preventing cavities and alleviating the growth of bacteria that produce acids that cause damage to tooth enamel.
  • It boosts energy levels naturally without as much caffeine you get from coffee.
  • It aids in digestion and keeps nausea, colic and other symptoms of indigestion away.
  • It helps in regulating sugar levels in the blood.
  • The bergamot in Earl Grey tea is said to help in curing fever and improving the immune system.
  • It has antidepressant and antioxidant properties that are beneficial for the body and mind.

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BEING A MOM IS A BRAVE JOB FOR WARRIORS OF LOVE

Being a mom is one of the bravest jobs. You start out pregnant (or adopting) and ... you kind of can be in denial for a bit until your belly grows and you have to start buying stuff you don't know how to put together.

You quickly learn that you really don't have a clue what you are doing. So you need to get brave real quick. Learn. Ask questions and hopefully work to get some sort of footing under you.

Giving birth is ... a challenge. It can be one of the most beautiful things but it can be the most scary as well.

You can experience losing babies, things going bad, loss, grief. And in the face of that, some try again and again. Being brave.

You might have had a great mom and childhood. Or you might have not. Not to make one worse than the other, but seriously, that book ... what to expect when you are expecting ... it's about 30% of what you really need to know. When you've come from less, being handed that infant to love, take care of, not break or otherwise .... whatever ... it's a rather large tasks that is way FREAKING OVERWHELMING.

But as a mom ... if you can get 3 moments or so of ... beauty ... it is all ok. The hours of crying melt away when you get that moment of peace with a cheek on your breast, or a naked foot peeking out from under the covers.

They grow up. You grow up. You learn. They learn. Hopefully things go well.

Some moms have to learn more and do more. They have been given the children that need more. The book gives zero help on this stuff. This is where you have to be brave brave. Especially if you don't have help or feel like what is around you isn't helping and doesn't align with you as a parent. Like when your child has learning issues or other ... specialness.

Momming is super hard.

Moms leave. Moms die. Moms aren't there. And sometimes, the child is left to learn on their own. And to become a mom of their own design. Scary stuff.

It is a hard lesson to learn that their spiritual and personal growth isn't always up to you.

Being a good mom is important to you. You are your own worst critic. As you want so much good for your babies. You want to do it "RIGHT". Making mistakes is tough ... as you wonder if it will mess up their leaves.

Sometimes it's with your mistakes that they learn from. And it is super hard to watch your children makes mistakes. It's hard to leave enough room to allow them to make mistakes.

So moms go into this thing with bravery. And the desire to do the best that they can. It is so tough to have part of your heart and soul out wandering around the world. The world that is a tough place and getting tougher.

Be brave. Do the best you can. LOVE HARD.

(people ... tell your mom they are awesome!)

BEING A MOM IS A BRAVE JOB FOR WARRIORS OF LOVE

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Homemade Granola

It's no secret I love to meal prep. I also freaking LOVE granola! So I try to keep this on hand because it holds up for a long time in an airtight container, and I've also vacuum sealed it and put it in the freezer. It doesn't usually last long though because I tend to take it everywhere!

I have a store by me called Fresh Thyme, they are amazing and they have a peanut grinder so you can grind your own fresh. It's super convenient and fun for the kids to do lol!

Also, this recipe is really flexible. Omit coconut if you don't like it. Feeling nutty? Add peanuts, almonds or cashews. If chocolate isn't your thing *gasp* then omit that too.

2 1/2 cups rolled oats (I prefer to not use the instant but it's up to you)

1/4 cup honey

1/4 cup butter or ghee

1/4 cup brown sugar (you can use coconut sugar too)

1/2 cup natural peanut butter

Dark chocolate chips, as many as you like

1/4 cup sunflower seeds

1/4 cup coconut flakes

1 tsp vanilla

1/4 tsp salt

  1. Heat oven to 350.
  2. Line a 9 inch baking dish with parchment or foil and spray with cooking spray. I use olive oil spray but use whatever you have.
  3. Place your oats and nuts, if using, on a baking sheet lined with parchment paper. Bake for 8-10 minutes, until toasted.
  4. Add honey, butter and brown sugar to a sauce pan and cook over medium heat until the sugar dissolves. Remove from heat and stir in vanilla and salt.
  5. Add the honey mixture to the oats and stir well. Add all other ingredients except chocolate and stir, the idea is to make sure there aren't any dry spots.
  6. If you are adding chocolate, wait about 10 minutes before adding so it doesn't just melt.
  7. Spread into your prepared pan and press down on it firmly. You can use a rubber spatula, your hand, the bottom of a cup. You just want to make it as dense as possible.
  8. Chill for 2 hours and cut into bars.

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I can’t find any of my ducks

I have a lot on my plate. Who doesn't? At the beginning of this year I threw down some big personally goals, most of those dealing with more emotional intelligence sprinkled with a ton of soul healing sprinkles. So I'm trying to get my ducks in a row enough to minimize the cray cray that my people around need need to deal with and helpfully for me to be able to have enough clear discernment to do this reasonable well. Not too much to ask right!?!?! Well ... I have some pretty decent sized soft spots that I'm wanting/asking/need to work on. Blah blah blah. You know the places in the soul that go with childhood trauma and drama, relationships that turned out to be like crashing airplanes and ... blah blah blah. So I'm focusing on rounding up and herding these ducks.

I'm a good enough duck.

I'm a safe duck.

I can do EPCI SHIT duck.

Not all the ducks in my space are MY DUCKS and I don't need to let them jerk my ducks around.

This duck herding business tho, it's been pretty intense because what I'm finding out is that ... I'm needing to learn how to deal with other peoples ducks. Like some people just let their darn ducks get into my pasture and mislead, confused and another wise brain wash my my ducks. And off they go. Or ... I have these ducks in my pasture that aren't my ducks and I adopt them. Like I have time and energy for that. It just gets so confusing. Historically I have talking/vented/blah blah blah with my person on this stuff. And while that is good. I would like to develop a better habit of dealing with the duck cluster thing. Who's ducks are whose. And which duck do I need to herd first. Meditation. Yep. I haven't been doing enough and I need to but honestly ... I need something a little more concrete and tangible right now. So Becky and I were chatting, I need to write the ducks down. And this is the ONE time that auto correct gets it right. From fuck to duck. Prefect! Hahahahaha.

🤭🤗🤣🤣🤣👊🏻

So in my journal where I keep all things that I want to manifest the heck out of, aka the super women journal that enables me to do EPIC SHIT ... I'm going to work on a section labeled "Ducks". I am already in love with the idea, as me and my 5 other personalities can write stuff down, work through it and everyone can contribute words to help work through things. AND I can practice ...

FAITH

PATIENCE

WISDOM

... In dealing with the duck that has gotten itself too far away from the herd. Or whatever a group of ducks is. I really love this idea as I struggle with not dealing with something, that makes me feel bad, not let a problem go. Like I'm not standing up for my feelings, values and what not. But also I like this idea because I LOVE LOVE LOVE when i manage to let magic come into the picture and take care of STUFF for me. BOOM. And this magic journal that I have. This is the place for it to happen.

🌸Personal growth. Being brave. Honest. Persistency moving forward. Adapting. 💫

🔥🔥🔥Adjusting Fire🔥🔥🔥

❤️Hopefully with less road rash for myself and those special people around me that matter most.❤️

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Tahini Cookies

Healthy cookies? YES PLEASE! These cookies are yummy and are gluten free/dairy free. Ya gotta try them! I add more or less chocolate depending on how my cravings are.

1/2 C tahini

1/2 C maple syrup

1 tsp vanilla

1 egg

1 C oats

1 C almond flour

1/2 tsp baking soda

1/2 tsp sea salt

1/2-3/4 C dark chocolate chips

  1. Heat oven to 350. Line baking sheets with parchment paper.
  2. Add tahini, syrup and vanilla to a food process and process until well combined.
  3. Add egg and blend, then add oats, flour, salt and baking soda. Pulse until the oats are broken up, then stir in chocolate chips.
  4. Drop batter by the tablespoon and bake 12-14 minutes.

Cool completely, then store in an airtight container. I've also frozen these and they hold up well. It makes roughly 2 dozen cookies.

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5 Ways to Encourage Better Eating Habits

We need to make an intentional effort to slow down and eat with intention and mindfulness. This will really make a big positive impact on your gut health and overall health. FOR INSTANCE: If you eat a bit slower, your hormones that tell you you are no longer hungry have time to tell you you're no longer hungry if you eat slower. ;) hehehe. So ... I usually eat 1/2 my meal first. And admittedly it's usually fair quick, but I'm usually pretty hungry. But ... then I set down my fork, I look at the people I'm eating with, chat with them and experience the other joys of social stuff. Thats good for you too by the way. Then I look at my food and decide if I want to eat more. Or if I do and I know I don't need to ...I ask myself why, and ... is it the best thing. If I really want to because it's a food that I really like or socially it's the thing to do .... like nachos, I LOVE LOVE LOVE nachos.... then I will mindfully splurge. Out of joy. And I will NOT have that voice that says ... so now you need to run extra tomorrow. I'm ok with being a bit fluffy. For nachos. Now ... not so much for the mindless eating of chocolate that I do. Usually in secret. Or at night. Just last night, Derek asked me what I was munching on. AT 3:30 AM PEOPLE!!! I said "oh not much" and he said "chocolate". ... he said, hey, I don't care but you are the one complaining about being fat. Not me. Anyway. We can make a lot of changes to our gut health and overall health if we learn to do things differently when we are eating, take the stress level down a couple notches. It is very important HOW you eat. Here are some suggestions. OMG BRING YOUR BODIES INTO REST and DIGEST

  1. Leave any problems behind. Don't talk about work at the table. Practice hitting pause during stressful thoughts during dinner time. Create some rituals around eating. We pray before we eat. Setting the table can be enough to slow you down and bring the body into a calm state. Eating needs to be a time for nourishment. Not doing a bunch of things and get it done asap. This impacts your gut motility, digestive enzymes, etc. Savoring how the food tastes. Make the best nacho bite each time. Pay attention to your breathing. Talk about fun things, happy things. The main thought is that you are focused on the present
  2. Create body awareness. Eating is a physical activity. However our minds wonder off. So then we don't hear the body's cues. Savor each bite. Build the best nacho bite with each bit. Share your food with your people. Pay attention to your breathing. Focus on a calming word or imagine. Focus on the PRESENT MOMENT. This helps the body to understand that nothing is threatening at that particular moment.
  3. Express Gratitude. You can pray. Or say what you are grateful for the day. Or share what was the best part of their day. This helps to bring positivity into the. moment. To be present. And to share things that help the body to come into a relaxed and safe feeling space.
  4. Eat without distraction. Work and technology free zone. No phones. TVs. Etc. This really helps the body to be present in the moment. And your mind. Share time with your people. This is so important and can really help the overall dealings with stress. Plus this helps us to be present with other people around. Which ends up being less stressful for them. They are more happy that you are listening to them. Talk. Converse.
  5. Dine in pleasant surroundings. Clearing the table. Music. Candle. Dine outside. Build a fire. You don't' have to be on a date to set the "mood". Dine with other people, friends and family, to help with bringing the body into a very relaxed and happy state.
The GI tract works the best when the mind and body are calm and in a relaxed state. This allows blood flow to go to the digestive tract. And for other processes to start, like the salivary function. Smelling that awesome food. :). When the nervous system is in the relaxed state it can focus on digestive functions. So even if you are in the car, thinking of cramming food into your mouth, you can stop for a minute and breath deeply for a bit. You can work to relax for just a moment.

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What Ironman Triathlon Did for my life

I was chatting with a fellow Ironman Triathlete about coaching earlier this morning and we were having a little chuckle about how your perspective changes after a season or two of ironman. You get to a place where you have a ton of mental Grit to get done (and do it well) just about anything you set your mind to. And just a ton of other wonderful things that happen. Let's looking at this awesome list. Mental Grit: There is something that happens when you push yourself past self imposed limitations, over and over, and learn that yes there are limits, but usually we stop way before those. I was really gifted with this two times, once in my first IM in Wisconsin during the swim portion. I had almost drowned as a child so getting to the point of being able to do the swim well without freaking the heck out was a ton of mental grit, through the whole season and race day. It's was one of my most beautiful life moments. The other was doing the very best that I could at IMTX in 2018, where during the run it was a full moon, I was praying, and running. Running when I didn't want to. Running when everyone else was walking. Running to chase down a time that I knew I wouldn't get, but doing the best I could anyway. Heal your soul: When you allow yourself get stripped down during ironman season ... you see things about yourself that don't serve you anymore. Things that you know need to evolve in order to get the astronomical task done. If you're brave enough to face your demons and help them to heal ... your soul heals. You evolve into that next best version of yourself. And it's so much quicker than a lot of personal growth challenges. The feedback is pretty immediate. Kinda like pixie dust if you go the chops to look at it like that. A story from my life, I almost drowned when I was little. And that was surrounded by ample amounts of childhood trauma. So the swim anxiety that I experienced during swim was of the extreme nature. Through a series of hard experiences, many failures, techniques, not giving up and a whole bunch more ... I managed to move past fake it until you make it, to healing my heart. It was such a wonderful experience to complete my first ironman swim, Wisconsin Mass Swim start, probably one of the best experiences to be had, with no anxiety. That is the first time that I really grasped that I could move past my childhood issues. That I didn't have to live a life of dealing with my crazy. Some of it I could transform into a healed cornerstone of strength. Strong Body: If you are doing the training right, your body goes through a series of evolutions where you heal through injuries. If you have the help that you need, you end up cultivating a body that is more sound and balanced. You are left with a body that is epically strong, the mind is a metric f ton stronger and you feel invincible. You might still be a little fluffy and imperfect, but that's really not the point. Confidence: You have achieved something most people wouldn't do. You've done something that you thought you couldn't. You know how to approach fear and challenges and come out on top. AND .... sometimes those things roll downhill and affect your friends, family and maybe even the little people. #thelittlesarealwayswatching Training for something very difficult can be very rewarding. It can be very hard and I have seen where people don't make it. They turn and go another direction. And thats ok. You have to be READY to take on that challenge. Not feel like you are ready. Not think that you are ready. It's a little secret that your soul shares with you, drives you forward. When you are doing something and you think to yourself ... why the heck did I think this was a good idea, but somewhere in a secret place in your heart, a voice says to keep going. That READY. If you aren't ready for the difficulties, that just means you have other work to do to get ready. And that doesn't mean that attempting an ironman isn't where you do the "get ready" part. There is nothing that says that everyone will complete their mission the first time out. In fact, on paper that is just silliness. Most people that accomplish big A things fall on their face the first time. GRACE AND GRIT: Thats what I think triathlon and ironman really gifts you with. Hopefully we all learn that we are all very capable. We are all enough. We are all FREAKING badassly awesome and we don't have anything to prove. These hard things are just to help us learn and grow. Not prove a damn thing. Doesn't matter if you are overweight and doing ironman. Or a pro athlete finishing first. We are all wonderful human beings that have a voice, have a story and need to SHINE our love and gifts out to the world. This is what I think ironman helps us learn how to do. At an Ironman. At life. As a parent. Spouse. Friend. This is why I tell my athletes .... train train train for the best damn finisher picture you can. This attitude is the sum total of this. To let your heart and soul shine when you FINISH your goal. When you ACCOMPLISH what you set out to do. You will look back and see that on the inside ... you are soo beautiful and strong. You are enough. And you're badass. ;) <3

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